At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
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