He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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