So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
love makes seman taste better
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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