your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize