dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
