plz talk dirty to me
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
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I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
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Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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