Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
