Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
