Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
