Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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