He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
