I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
