She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
