I love watching others lives come down to our level.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
