I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize