just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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