check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize
