dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
