I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
