its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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