i just had sex bonerless
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize