At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
She's the barista slut.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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