remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Randomize
