Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
