Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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