I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize