yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
