Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
