Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
