Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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