No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
