I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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