well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize