He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
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Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
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I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I deserve this hangover.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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