Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
