Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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