U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
