the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize