I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
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