I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My dick has a subreddit
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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