I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize