god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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