You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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