Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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