fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
