my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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