there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
