69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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