Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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