it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Randomize
